Ready to Live I – V


So I sat there, on the ottoman in the studio, for some time today, not knowing where to begin painting. Then the arrow at the bottom drew me to it, Fill me in, it said. And it will take some time. I may have to paint it white and then yellow. We shall see. The yellow is quite translucent compared to the darker colors beneath the arrow where I am wanting to take it.

Then I painted several stripes in, and went tangerine mix, going over the Iron Oxide stripe that had decided to go up, if you recall. So sorry. But it had to go tangerine. I like the painting much better now, as it is much closer to my original schemey scheme. Then, tired as all get out, but not ready to stop, I painted a Cadmium Red stripe, and then balanced with a stripe of the same on the far right to balance. Yes.

Now I can collapse. Boo yah.

Today counseling went rather well, compared to me wanting to run away from massive pain like on Friday. That’s always a nice change. We talked about goals and in addition to team effort, since I have little control over the changing of hosts and alters, some, since I do cope and function, but little CONTROL, a team of sorts is the continued goal — continued release of pent up emotions, and integration of identity pieces that were repressed. You see I was this quiet mousey Southern thing and I’m quite wild. Vivacious and fun. So that needs to balance out. I’m a Buddhist, but the Yin and the Yang need to balance out a lot more in public. Not just in my creativity. In my personality that I express. Yah. Those be the goals. Ar.

Did Christmas cards up to the stamps I bought yesterday and took them to the mailman next door at the rental office for pickup, where they have the decorations and the carols and even reindeer antlers, on the head. Awesome. Quite cheery. And where we do the cards at the dining room table? We are at the feet as it were, of the Christmas tree, so we look up to the ornaminks, and I have all the ones we’ve received, and the presents, and a candle. It’s quite cheery as well.

Then laundry folding. Have a neighbor coming tomorrow. Quite the headache came upon me, but I kept pushing myself. Kind of had to. I said to meself.

Put up quickly a See Me while she’s still free:

If you feel moved to do so, please click the Support button to encourage my artwork! Cool beans! Get it out there in the WORLD!

Then painted. Now I must get on the heating pad.

Didn’t blog yesterday because I did the commingled and paper recycled for the week. Just two light bags light enough for even me to carry to the dumpster and I couldn’t bend in any direction at the waist without severe pain. So there was no painting. There was no anything. Just rest.

And here I go doing stuff today. But not too much. Just enough to have a smallish day.

Chipper and hot pad here I come! Meditating also for Light into the Darkest time of the year. There is still of lot of balancing to be done, in my world, in the world. I try to do my itty part. 🙂


About amyjacksoncc

I am a professional artist, writer and musician creating from my home studio. To view my artwork, visit
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