I just wanted to check in with you all since it’s been so long …
We’re still way sick.
I went to the doctor yesterday and for real I have an upper respiratory viral infection. Yay.
She said check in next Friday if need be.
Ack, said Bill the cat, if you’re hip to that.
I did sleep better last night but it was with headphones so I could have music over my own chest squeaking — ow!
I am officially a squeaky toy. Take note.
That sort of humor, goth humor, you have NO idea. It’s on this week.
Poor Chipper is hanging in there with us as the only bright spark in the room.
We’re going to order a pizza.
Had to cancel all the physical therapy, but did go in for the wonderful and much-needed massage on Thursday, and counseling yesterday, of course.
The good thing/transition for my heart is that a light switched on and I now have much hope for it. That happened about mid-week, but we did go over a lot of Mother issues and many new alters I found in my heart through this process of meditation and journalling in counseling yesterday and it was groundbreaking.
Also, at one point in sixth grade, when I was being abused by three folks at a time, I was almost at the breaking point and told one teacher but … sigh … sad situation … I realized in my mind the terror that I could know that some crime was happening but could not verbalize it to anyone, that I was so messed up, it was terrifying, mentally at the time. All I could say to anyone was how alone and goofy I felt around people, how hard it was to talk to anyone about anything at all, or make friends, at what is already an awkward stage for kids, right?
Ivy Girl is an alter who is associated with sixth grade because there was a lot of literal ivy growing around where the piano teacher used to live and where I was driven to be talked to about these sorts of things … where I used to want to throw myself out of the truck/car … she likes her name.
I’ve also come to the realization that each part of my full name has an association/identity with me Amy/Malinda/Jackson, so we are working through that as well in counseling.
I just read in the Meditation for the Love of It that heart meditation, and I’m paraphrasing this super-loosely, is really the root of it all. Well, yay. I’ve stumbled upon something good, and powerful. Thank you so much, yet again, Sally Kempton. 🙂 And all the Masters.
Because Love is the seat of goodness and the heart is the center of the love source. Well, you get it. I’m loopy today as all get out.
And that the oldest part of you, the part that doesn’t die when you die, is your awareness, so take note of that if you will. It’s old and childlike and wonderful, all at once.
Today is misty and rainy in the nicest sort of way, and WARM. Don’t tell Winter, but I think Spring got here. Really, don’t tell. The forecast is warm for days …
Pedicure soon for the toesies?
Hey, so there’s the Art League of Germantown Shades of Spring Show at Black Rock Center for the Arts coming up this Wednesday through Sunday. We drop off on Monday and I start volunteering on Wednesday afternoon. Hence the pedi, right? Ha. So I have to get better.
I’m rather excited, yes? Two pieces from the Ready to Live series are hopefully going to fit in the show — we’ll see — the one that went to Grand Rapids, and the last one in the series.
Oh, hey, this is sad, my Yoga for Injuries class got cancelled. But I don’t know that I would have been up for it? The Opus Yoga Studio has offered their Gentle Yoga class, and we shall see what I’m up for. I’ll see how pt goes and check in with them when I can.
Last night was the first night I was able to do any poses besides child’s poses, and it felt sooo good. Just that little bit.
Okay, well I’ve got to go rest me. Thought I’d check in.