So here is where we left off … September 25 and I’m assuming, not being upright enough of a blog citizen to actually CHECK … that it was Godzone II. So there. And I was having a hella time between going representational and being all Wyeth or something. Ida know. I do know I was last using a teeniny round brush there on the right for allllllll that dark green. In a frenzy. It was a crazy day of some sort.
Today is much different. See above. I painted the gray of the mountains smoothly with a mid-size to smallish bright brush. I started to not remember to mix a goodly enough amount of the color I would need for such a large mountain, but caught myself, the experienced painter stepping in for me (like riding a bike, eh?) and mixed said goodly amount just fine. I had fun. There’s something about painting that flows from the soul and the body and … boy, well, it just felt damned good. What can I say?
Then I mixed the bit of yellows and a tiny bit of green for the extension of the field in the middle. Called it a day.
Music of choice for said painting renewal session: Sun by Cat Power. Oh, yes.
Feeling somewhat better today and Jason and I both wonder if the Coumadin was affecting me adversely. Well, whatever I had to go there. And I’m done with it now. So.
Still rather congested but don’t feel beat up, though still tired. Wierd ass cold.
Back is better today and I thank a good night’s sleep and light yoga for the past few days. Today going down the stairs like an old lady into my counselor’s basement office I thought that my health from now on will have periods of being fit and being sick. I’m going now back into the fit phase. Yes.
Counseling was especially good today, as I had sent her little snippets of important memories via email that alters wanted to discuss in session when there was time. We got to two of them today, after going over how I immediately put pressure on myself to perform and schedule once I was able to paint again. GAh! ARgh! So we freed up that bit to play and play …. and then we talked about how my math teacher humiliated me when we were learning simple math and how she was just horrible. So that was good to release and vex about really for the first time in session. Was pretty cramped up about that still somewhere about that. Seriously. Great with algebra and geometry, trigonometry, but calculus, if it were not for a dear dear university professor, I would not have a college degree AT ALL. She was awful. Whatever. We went over that.
We also went over how when I was a mascot in first grade for my eldest brother’s graduating high school class in 1971, how I took it as a responsibility to be like a little pep girl kind of. Charm girl. But how I kind of linked it to Flower Girl, peace movement. So that alter totally loves the adult Buddhist. Boy do they grok. They love smiling at strangers and trying to pass along the general joy of life. Peace, man! Hee. What happened to that. I’ve noticed that white people generally, don’t get me wrong, but they don’t seem to like strangers as much and think you want something from them or are crazy. It depends on where you are, for sure. Don’t get me wrong. I’m going to keep trying. You guys keep passing the joy and watch out for me and maybe we can smile. It’s a small town thing, too. Remember The Waltons? Man, they wouldn’t know what to do with a crazed gunman of today. They were all, like, hey. Friends. Neighbors, helping each other out. It was beyond their conception that someone would do something dastardly. And so it should be.
And so. I smile. I hope. Peace, man.